Dating in the dark….

This month, the lovely Sarah Finley (of The Loves and Life of a London Girl fame) is back to tell us about the perils of a blind date - literally!

Blind dates are one thing... You know the sort – when a friend tells you they have the perfect match for you and visa versa. Then you turn up and realise you would have preferred to have spent the evening with a lion at feeding time. So actual blind dating could be quite hazardous. Step up Dans Le Noir – a restaurant in London were you’re actually sat, eating your meal, in complete darkness.

Sounds scary, huh? Well it’s not as bad as it sounds actually. I had the pleasure of visiting it last year with friends and loved the experience. After being led into a darkened room by blind waiters you’re left to enjoy a surprise menu, and hopefully not get the contents of your plate all down your front.

But going on a date in a darkened restaurant, now that’s another thing. So when a potential first date suggested it I wondered what sort of loon I’d been set up with. I didn’t even reply to him, let alone date him. Fast forward six months and into a particularly bad dating drought and I thought, ‘why not?’ – What’s the worst that could happen?

Well a lot of things actually – a slight pause in conversation could feel like an eternity of awkwardness, a mistaken red wine spill could end in a disastrous date outfit and don’t get me started on mistaken identity – what if you end up speaking to the wrong date all night?

Thankfully I didn’t encounter any of these – phew! But walking into a darkened room with a virtual stranger did seem slightly odd. Fumbling around in the dark is usually at least third date territory - so being plunged into darkness and left to almost fend for your self from date numero uno is, I suppose, a little mad!

But there are some upsides of dating in the dark. Because when your date can’t actually see you it gives you the perfect opportunity to throw that first date dinner etiquette out of the window. Instead of sitting there politely cutting your meal likes it’s a delicate flower you can tuck your napkin in your t-shirt and dig in with your hands - without your date thinking you’re a complete slob. And that’s exactly what I did – well nobody’s exactly going to know, are they?

Thankfully the experience didn’t scar me for life or give me a fear of the dark. But just like the cinema, maybe Dans le Noir isn’t quite first date material. A first date is all about sussing them out – reading their body language, using eye contact and flirting, and you can’t really do that when you’re in the dark – can you?

So by all means date in the dark and enjoy dinner in the dark – but maybe enjoy your first date, with who ever it is, somewhere where you can actually see them.

By Sarah Finley

Read more of Sarah’s dating tales at http://thelovesandlifeofalondongirl.blogspot.com/

Actions speak louder than words...

This week our guest blog is written by journalist Kerry Wiatt - who reckons actions speak louder than words - so she's suggesting some brilliant "activity dates" from all around London. From go karting for the sporty, to cocktail making for those that enjoy a more alcoholically based date... Enjoy!

The hard work is done. You’ve approached someone and not only have you got on famously but you’ve secured their phone number and a date for the weekend. Now it’s time for the grand finale – the date itself. What to wear, how to smell and choosing the right time should all come secondary to one of the most important factors – location, location, location.

No, we’re not talking Kirsty and Phil hunting out the perfect countryside forever home for you and your new beau; perhaps wait a few dates for that, but picking the right location for your first date is imperative.

In one of the most vibrant cities in the world, a lunch or dinner date seems, well, just a little dull for your first time meeting. Low-lighting and romantic music is far too intense whilst crowded, bustling restaurants will make it hard to converse easily. Thankfully, with miles of original, creative and quirky places to go, London does the work itself. All you have to do is pick and choose. And that’s what we’re here for.

My suggestion would be to get interactive. Remember the old saying actions speak louder than words? They absolutely do and show an awful lot about who you really are. Pick a pursuit that will see you learning a new skill, getting your hands dirty or competing as a team. Not only will you have something to chat about throughout your whole date, but it will encourage fun, laughter and conspiratory behaviour as you join forces and learn something new!

The Gaucho chain of restaurants in London runs a fabulous series of workshops for couples. The Chocolate and Malbec Masterclass at Gaucho Smithfield allows guests to make their own chocolates whilst attempting to pair them with the perfect wines. The Cocktail Masterclasses, meanwhile, offer an interactive group experience that incorporates five classic cocktails with a twist. Paired up, you will make your drinks as the Masterclass leader talks you through each one, with a ‘taste off’ competition for the best drink of every round. This will culminate with the two highest-scoring teams taking part in a final ‘shake off’ with a surprise drink and, of course, a prize for the winners.

If food is more your bag, why not try making Ceviche, a mouth-watering, traditional South American delicacy made by marinating raw seafood in citrus juices. Tutored by Gaucho’s Head Chef, the 45-minute Ceviche Masterclass shows you how they are made and then helps you to recreate them. Perfect for summer; couples can also book a place on the Sweet and Sticky Masterclass enjoying an afternoon of Argentinean ice-cream making.

And if the date goes well? You can slip off somewhere quiet and scenic to enjoy your delicious creations and mull over your new culinary skills.

Of course, some of you city types like to live life in the fast lane. For you, head to Mile End Outdoor Karting Track London, which offers 650 meters of outdoor, floodlit track with a brand new fleet of karts able to reach speeds of 50 miles per hour. Get competitive and show your date what you’re made of before ending the evening with a moonlit onsite BBQ. Remember, you’re not Lewis Hamilton and your date won’t appreciate a broken nose or cut lip after you slam them into the track walls. Take it easy and have fun!

There’s something terribly sexy about casinos even if you’re playing for pennies. Dim lighting, cocktails, risky decisions, kissing dice for luck, doubling down on Black Jack and coming away with a pocket full of cash; it’s all very Indecent Proposal and makes for a great first date. Set yourselves a cash and time limit before you arrive to ensure the evening doesn’t become tedious. Napoleons in Leicester Square is my favourite: quiet, sultry and exclusive.

I’m almost loathe to tell you about my final location as it really is one of the best kept secrets in London. Maybe the name in itself will put you off but I sincerely hope not as this truly is one of the most camp and quirky places you could ever take a first date. Bethnal Green Working Man´s Club hosts a free to attend Game Night every Friday. A weird and wacky mix of bingo, karaoke, dancing and cabaret with the most eclectic range of guests, there is never a dull moment and you can even order takeaway to your table. Guaranteed to have you in stitches, the drinks are cheap, the games are hilarious and I’ll put money on you having one of the best, random nights of your life.

Written by Kerry Hiatt

For more of Kerry’s tales visit her blog http://kerryhiatt.com/blog/

Bank Holiday Romance

So, the first Bank Holiday of the year. The weather has been fantastic over the last few days and summer's on its way, so Miss Mary thought she would plan a romantic little trip to the New Forest - she and Other Half will be staying in the adults only (ooh err) section of Toms Field Campsite in Hampshire.

The BBQ has arrived from Amazon, the sunglasses have been returned by the friend whose sunny garden they were left in, the sun cream's been dug out from the back of the bathroom cupboard, the weather forecast has been checked… hang on… what… change of plan? No way! Miss Mary's a true Brit and there's nothing we Brits love more than a little bit of friendly competition from the weather!

Other Half is not so excited about putting the sun cream back in the cupboard and swapping his flip-flops for a pair of wellies, but hey-ho it will still be a great weekend!

If you're not convinced that camping makes a great date you'd be wrong. Miss Mary isn't exactly suggesting it for a first date (that would definitely be a bad idea) but it's a great thing for couples to do. At the risk of sounding like a therapist, it gets you out of London, away from your laptop and (although I hate the phrase) it allows you to spend "quality time" together.

Having said that, it might be worth asking Miss Mary on Tuesday what the definition of "quality time" is, as she and Other Half will be coming to terms with the fallout over the tent-assembly-in-the-rain/dark situation!

If you think you've got a better idea for a great date this Bank Holiday weekend (some would argue that wouldn't be very difficult) then let us know. Post a comment below, on the website, on the facebook page, or email us.

Whatever your plans are this weekend - enjoy!

Action Date!

Below is the first of our features from guest bloggers - this week it is the wonderfully witty Sarah Finley who writes The Loves and Life of a London Girl. Keep reading to hear what she has to say about the fearful prospect of being asked out on an "action date"!

WARNING: Action dates are not for the faint-hearted...

For me dating is usually in the safe surroundings of a bar or restaurant – where alcohol is readily supplied and comfort is key. So when a potential date asked me accompany him to a spinning class – for our first date – I almost bottled it.

Now I’m not the kind of girl to shy away from a bit of exercise – I’m a regular on the spinning bikes and running has recently become like a dear old friend, unlike the enemy it was during cross country PE lessons at school. But exercising and dating – now that would be a first.

And any sort of action dates, I suppose if I’m honest, scare me. I’m prone to falling over in heels after a few too many vinos so god knows what would happen if you armed me with a bowling ball, some ice skates or even a dart. More than likely it would end with some sort of embarrassment or my date phoning 999 – not the best first impression.

Begrudgingly I of course agreed to the spinning date – he was cute, I’m shallow and I hadn’t been on a date in ages! Getting me out of the house was a different matter – my friend had to literally push me out of the door before I changed my mind. And when I arrived at the gym I wasn’t any better – my nerves had hit that point which meant I was physically shaking and I’m sure I started sweating even before any exercise took place. How was I going to get through a whole spinning class? And more to the point did he actually think I’d be able to make any decent conversation while I was slowly turning a beetroot shade of red and panting for England.

But I figured if he still liked me after seeing me all hot and bothered then I must be on to a winner. So, on we span, with a middle-aged sweaty man in between us, while we tried to make decent conversation and I pretended not to be too self conscious about the sweat dripping down my face.

Of course I expected him to avoid me like the plague afterwards so when he asked me out on a normal date – in a cosy bar with all my familiarities – I couldn’t believe ‘action Sarah’ had actually gone and done it. Now where did I put those darts...

Written by Sarah Finley

For more of Sarah’s dating tales visit her blog http://thelovesandlifeofalondongirl.blogspot.com

sunny afternoon in Ham...

I love London but I'm a country girl at heart so there's nothing I like more than getting out of the city. But, when the weekend is so precious I don't want to spend half of it in the car! So what's the answer? Ham! Not the kind that goes in a sandwich but the kind that sits between Richmond and Teddington on the mighty River Thames.

There are two ways of doing this. Either park your car in the National Trust car park at Ham House or hire a boat from Richmond and row up stream. I've never done the boat option but it's on my list! Anyway, organise your day as you wish but this is how we did it… We walked to Ham village green, which is a picture perfect English scene. I don't think I've ever been there when there hasn't been a game of village cricket going on! Then we walked into Richmond Park (always a GDG favourite), turned left by the Ham Gate duck pond and eventually popped out at the Petersham Gate. We then bravely walked passed one of my favourite spots - Petersham Nurseries, where the tea shop is located in a converted garden shed and the restaurant in an old glasshouse. It is a quirky and beautiful spot but it gets busy (hence why we gave it a miss on such a sunny day) so if you want to go to the restaurant you really have to book.

Head a little further down the river bank and you get to Ham House. It's worth a whiz around the gardens (and house if you like that sort of thing) but most import is the tea shop! It's located in the old Orangery Kitchen Garden and is an idyllic spot, away from the chaos of the river on a sunny day. Laze around the gardens at Ham for as long as you want or take a stroll along the river bank - there is always something going on. If you want to venture further afield you can always hop on the £1 ferry outside Ham House that takes you over to the other side of the river…

It is so easy to walk from place to place along this stretch of the river that you can happily while away a romantic summers day. This is a perfect date for those wanting to bask in the glory of their existing romance, but equally good for those early days when you want to get out of London but aren't quite ready for a mini break!

Rootmaster

Tired of the same old restaurants? Read on to find out about something VERY different! In fact, we are not even talking about a restaurant, we are talking about a bustaurant! That's right - the Rootmaster is a restaurant on an old Routemaster bus!

So, if you are looking for a quirky date we think we've come up trumps. You can start your date off by grabbing a drink at one of our East London favourite haunts The Boundary, or go to any of the trendy bars within the eternally hip Truman Brewery.

Once you've quenched your thirst, head along to the bus, located in Ely's Yard which is part of the Truman Brewery. The Rootmaster is London's first vegan bustaurant. Founded in 2006 it aims to promote healthly living and respect for the environment, but if that all sounds too noble for you, don't worry - it is also a fantastically original venue in its own right serving delicious grub! Anyway, it will do you good to have a conscience for the night - it might even impress your date...

Having said that, if your date is a serious carnivore they might not love you for taking them to the Rootmaster but we think even hardened meat eaters should allow themselves one night off to come to this brilliant bustaurant. Renowned for it's relaxed atmosphere and friendly staff it would make a great option for a first date.

You'll get turfed off the bus at 11pm (10.30pm on Sunday) but that doesn't mean your night has to be over. There are loads of late night venues in the area but one of our favourites has got to be The Brickhouse. They offer live cabaret every night so you and your date are guaranteed to be entertained until the wee small hours!

Sitting in a Tree

Sitting in a Tree is an online dating and matchmaking site that's different, refreshing and fun. Started and run by real-life love gurus who know what makes for a great relationship; their success rate is second to none!

Having met the three lovely ladies who set up Sitting in a Tree we can safely say that they are on your side! Having heard the laments of many an ex-online dater, their aim is to elevate the internet experience to a new, friendlier, more enjoyable level.

So, what makes it different to other online dating sites? Well, take a look below:

"We’ve got two choices for you folks looking for love. The online bit is a community for you to seek out the perfect partner in a fun way. If you want to get to know a fair bit about people before you commit to a date, have a look through our illuminating profiles - they tell you what the person’s really like. If you want to meet up, we make that part easy too, calendar functions, venue suggestions, the works. The only thing we don’t do is come on the date with you. That would be weird."

"If you don’t have much free time to spend picking people yourself, we can do the legwork for you. So long as you jump the right hurdles and sound like our cup of tea, we let you into the fold. We’ve got a bespoke London-based service where we personally match you using our own magic methods."

As you know, we don't usually promote online dating and matchmaking sites but we really love www.sittinginatree.co.uk because they tell it like it is. The site is all about being honest and not discovering any nasty surprises when turn up for your date!

These girls have successfully "matchmade" most of their friends - why not give them a chance with you?