Sam's September Competition!

Autumn has definitely arrived so we thought we'd keep your spirits up by offering you the chance to win a meal for two at the wonderful Sam's Brasserie in Chiswick.

Always a firm favourite here at the Great Date Guide (partly because 5 first dates at Sam's have lead to engagements!) we were excited to hear that Sam and his team were re-vamping the bar... and what better way to celebrate the re-launch than with a competition?!?

Take a look below at the designs for the new bar area and click here for your chance to enter the competition.

The competition ends on the 30th September 2011... Good luck!

Miss Mary x

the early days date

You've made it through the first date, you liked what you saw, and now you're full of eager anticipation for dates 2, 3 and 4! 'Early days' dating can be the most exciting and exhilarating of the lot, so it's important to make the most of it. Apart from anything else, this is the time for getting to know each other and for this reason your choice of dating activity and venue is key - make no mistake about it, you WILL be being judged! To help you on your way, here's what we hope is a fail safe guide to getting the best out of the early days date.

Mix it up

All going to plan, you'll go on a few of these fantastic early dates, which gives you the opportunity to try out a variety of different dating options. Just make sure you remember that word 'variety'. Three dinner dates in a row is an uninspiring choice and you'll risk the 'fizzle out'. Equally, three action packed adrenaline filled dates one after the other could just as easily send your date running for cover. Mix fun and interesting dates with relaxed and comfortable ones for the perfect combination.

It's not all about you

Opera may not be your idea of a great night out, but your date might simply adore it. Try and find out a little about his/her interests, and use the information to plan future dates. Not only will your questioning show that you are interested in them as a person, but if you can manage to remember some of it and incorporate it into the next date, you're guaranteed to please! (...showing that very thoughtful side of your personality whilst you're at it…)

Be honest… within reason!

There's not much point in not being yourself when you're building a new relationship, but clearly there will be some aspects of your personality that you might want to expose less than others! If you're renowned for your swagger, try and tone it down a little for the first few dates, whilst if you're not known for your adventurous spirit, make an effort to stretch your boundaries. A little self-improvement never goes amiss, and this is a good time to try it!

Who pays?

Here it is again, modern dating's enduring conundrum. You'll have got some clue from date number one as to what your date feels about this potentially sensitive issue, but as the dates go on the majority of people would expect some contribution from both parties. As well as being more fair, it also means that one party isn't left feeling indebted to the other. Whatever you do, just don't make a big fuss about it as you don't want your romantic date to end in financial bickering.

Don't expect too much

It's hard not to get excited when you've found someone you like, but do remember that it's pretty hard to tell where things are going to go this early on. You can ruin it for yourself by setting your expectations too high and not giving things a chance to develop.

The Bad Date Blog

Some more words of wisdom from our unlucky in love Bad Date Blogger, who has a cautionary tale to tell about friends bearing photographs…

A great way to get out there on a few dates is to call on your friends for a set-up or two. Most people I know always love a bit of matchmaking and are more than willing to help you find a date for Friday night - usually some amazing catch that they’ve been hiding away from you for years. But beware, while I’m sure much happiness has been found using this technique, make sure you know exactly what you’re getting into, and more importantly that you tell your friends exactly what you’re looking for.

BAD DATE BLOG PART 3: THE SET-UP

My tale starts with a suggestion of a set-up from my housemate with his friend from work. I happily agreed to a photo exchange, which now seems to be standard practice for set-ups of any kind. I quickly sent off the most recent photo of myself I could find on facebook where I wasn’t drunk/hungover/embarrassing myself. This was easier said than done but thankfully the fancy dress outfit didn’t scare off my potential date and an email with his chosen piccies soon arrived in my inbox. First impressions were not bad – nice smile, tall, full head of hair – pretty much all I’m looking for in a man…. Ok, so maybe not 100% my type but definitely worth a drink.

So a week and a bit later and I was heading off to meet my set-up for a drink in South Ken. I was feeling pretty optimistic, he’d chosen a great bar to meet in, seemed lovely on pre-date texts, and of course, I’d already seen the photos….

I wandered into the pub and started scanning the crowd, but no one was looking familiar apart from the spitting image of my dad’s best friend propping up the bar in the corner. I did a double-take but ignored him as there was no way the 65 year grandfather of three from Oxford would have been downing a pint in London on a Tuesday night.

Thinking I must have arrived a bit early, I grabbed a table and planned to wait for my date to come to me. But 5 or 10 minutes passed and still nothing… until I catch the eye of Gramps at the bar. He stares back. He smiles. He heads over to my table…

copyright Xavier  Bertels 

Unsure what to do I smiled nervously back as he approached wondering what this old man might want. I started to feel uneasy as he pulled out a chair at my table, sat down, and started to speak:

‘Hi ****, I didn’t see you come in – what would you like to drink?’

Damn, he knows my name, definitely my “blind” date then, as I realise the photo evidence I had seen must have been taken more than a few years (and dress sizes) ago. Not exactly what had been advertised by my housemate. Right, only one thing for it -

‘Mine’s a gin and tonic. Large’

Several drinks later I was actually having a good time. My OAP escort was pretty funny and easy to talk to… it was just a crying shame that he looked 30 years older than every other bloke in the pub! Did I have a good evening? Yes. Did sparks eventually fly? Ummm, no.  As lovely as he was I just didn’t fancy him. Don’t get me wrong, I’m a firm believer that personality is much more important than looks but I don’t think love was going to flourish when my first impression was disappointment. I was promised a tasty-looking young chap but ended up with a slightly more ‘distinguished’ gentleman.

It certainly hasn’t put me off set-ups as it was a perfectly pleasant evening but I’ll be wary of friends bearing photos in future. Needless to say I had words with my housemate - false advertising just isn’t cool people.

Written by our lovely, anonymous, bad date blogger!

The Bad Date Blog

Some more words of wisdom from our unlucky in love Bad Date Blogger, who made the fatal mistake of mixing burning hot oil with a third date...

So you’ve hopefully read my last blog and arrived at your date safely and in one piece but what now? The age-old question of what to do on a first date is a good one and should be thought through carefully… very carefully! Many a potential relationship has stalled due to over-ambitious or over-complicated dates so just watch it when coming up with a plan.

BAD DATE BLOG PART 2 - ACTIVITY AND ENTERTAINMENT

A fine example of this is my infamous Pancake Day date that seemed like such a good idea on paper and just went from bad to worse. It was a third date I think and the man in question wanted to cook me dinner. Excellent, I thought, there’s nothing more attractive than a bloke who can cook. I then realised that he’d suggested Shrove Tuesday so I said ‘Great, you cook dinner, I’ll do pancakes for dessert!’

It started rather well; I arrived at his flat and was pleasantly surprised to see it was a relatively girl-friendly zone. You never know what to expect when venturing into the man’s domain for the first time but his place was really nice, no beer can sculptures in the corner or Hollyoaks calendars on the walls – phew!

Wine was swiftly provided (the easiest way to make me feel at home) and he set to work in the kitchen. It all smelt delicious until a plate of suspiciously pink chicken was presented on the table in front of me. Right – what to do? Should I tuck in and hope for the best, or point it out and probably offend the chef? Is food poisoning ever sexy…? Too late to decide; he quickly spotted the problem and whisked my plate away, suggesting we move straight onto pancakes.

A lucky escape and it meant moving straight onto the fun part of the date – I mean how could anyone not love a bit of batter action? So the eggs were in the bowl, the oil was heating in the pan and a flipping challenge was quickly thrown out there by my date. Not being one to back down I limbered up and went for the full 360 degree flip. It might have been a slightly over-zealous attempt as I shot red-hot oil straight into my date’s eye who started screaming and holding his face in agony! ‘I’m blind! I’m blind!’

He quickly calmed down, as it must have occurred to him that his girlish screams were probably not attracting the lady, and suddenly manned up. But the damage had been done and any chance for romance got smaller and smaller as his eye got redder and redder!

It seemed a tactical retreat was the only answer so I made my excuses and left him to his eye bath. Funnily enough there wasn’t a fourth date – apparently some men just don’t like it when their dates maim them - what is the world coming to?

Written by our lovely, anonymous, bad date blogger!

The First Date - Our Guide

The first date, it’s a biggy. Whether it's the culmination of months of ground work or a ‘blind’ first meeting, the pressure is on. So, if the mere thought is enough to make you run and hide, here's my version of the basic rules to help you through. Who knows, if i'm right, your next 'first date' could also be your last!

1) Where to meet

You may know all the best places in Camden, but if your date resides in Camberwell they’ll be none too chuffed with the trek. Picking a location in their neck of the woods has also got its pitfalls however, as you may unwittingly pick somewhere that he / she loathes, or worse still the place they used to hang out with their ex. Tricky. The simple answer is to meet in the middle - don’t worry if that’s an area you don’t know much about - that’s what GDG exists for!

2) What to do

Clearly this depends on your personality, but you can’t go wrong with the standard evening drink. It’s easy to arrange, you’ve got hundreds to choose from and you get an alcohol flavoured helping hand to boot. Make sure you’ve got a plan for dinner afterwards assuming things go well. Dinner as a first date works well for many but do be aware that it can be hard to escape if the date turns out to be a bit of a damp squib. Alternatively do something a little different and go with an action date or try a twist on the classic cinema date - still a favourite with us.

3) Setting the tone

First impressions begin before you’ve even said hello, so getting the tone of the venue right is essential. Do you go for sophisticated or laid back? Cosy or chic? Grand or modest? The rule of thumb here is that whilst you’ve got to be seen to be making an effort, super smart or formal piles on unnecessary pressure and is best avoided. It may also terrify your date! Ideally what you need is somewhere relaxed but with a bit of a funky vibe, lots of atmosphere and plenty of other people around.

4) How to impress

This is easy. Make an effort but be relaxed about it. OK, so maybe it’s easier said than done but here are a few pointers:

• Wear something nice. It doesn’t have to be smart, but it does have to be attractive. We know you can do it.
• Be decisive in your ordering. Girl or boy, no one will like you if you can’t make decisions.
• Don’t worry about being interesting, it’s much more important to be interested. Find out about your date, listen to them, and if you catch yourself talking about yourself for too long, turn it around - quickly.
• Don’t, what ever you do, repeatedly look over his / her shoulder. You may well be finding the snogging couple behind a tad distracting, but constant glances at anything other than your date can be very off putting.
• Don’t get too drunk. It’s just not attractive.
• Finally and most importantly, smile a lot and be yourself. After all, if this is ever going to turn into something more, you’ve got to be liked for being you.

5) Who pays?

When it comes to paying the bill, be open minded - the two of you may have very different opinions about this. The basic rule of a first date is that the guy should offer to foot the bill (sorry boys…). Girls should offer to ‘go halves’. Just make a decision quickly and don’t drag it out.

6) How does it end?

It may be old fashioned, but we are of the strict opinion that inviting your date back to yours on date number one is a no no. By all means go for the lunge if you think you’re in with a chance, but go home to bed alone. If you really like them there will be plenty more opportunities to ‘sample their coffee’ but this way you’ll never do something you live to regret in the morning.

Want more pearls of wisdom? Check out www.thegreatdateguide.com with our compliments!

Film 4 summer screen at Somerset House

ⓒ Gideon Mendel

Exciting news! It's finally that time of year again and the giant screen at Somerset House is back. This really is one of my all time favourite dates, particularly on a lovely warm evening like tonight (let's just hope it lasts...)

This year it's running from 30th July 2010 to 8th August and it really does give you an amazing chance to experience cinema in a whole new light. Think American drive in (that jumping sausage scene from Grease) crossed with English country house grandeur - and it's all in central London!

This year's highlights are Kill Bill Volume 1 (the first and the best), Goldfinger and my personal favourite, The Lost Boys. If you're REALLY into your movies, there's also a variety of 'Behind the Screen' talks and discussions taking place prior to each evening's showing. On the other hand, unless your date is as into movies as you are, this part might be better avoided...

There are definitely a few insiders tips on this one. Bring a big rug, an umbrella (just to keep the sun off of course...), a picnic, something to drink and most importantly, LOTS of cushions. Numb bottom syndrome mid movie will really spoil the mood!

Sam's Brasserie Chiswick

Delicious food, great service, New York atmosphere… all in Chiswick.

Much like a like first date, when I go to review a restaurant I'm hoping for a good first impression. Turning up at Sam's Brasserie I was feeling pretty stressed out, over half an hour late, cursing Boris Johnson, and in need of a large glass of wine!

Once I stepped through the doors I knew I was going to be ok. First impressions were great! Not only did everyone in the place seem to know the eponymous "Sam", who in turn treated them all like regulars, but the relaxed atmosphere draws you in straight away. With it's warehouse vibe Sam's instantly reminded me of New York. It has that buzzy atmosphere which is perfect for a date: loud enough to feel popular but quiet enough to feel intimate.

Talking of intimate… if you're going on a date whether it be first, second or third you have to sit in one of the 2 person booths at the bar - they are made for romance! Tucked up to a wall on one side, and open to the bar on the other, you've again got the perfect combination of intimate and lively, not to mention a whole host of punters at the bar to provide you with conversation topics should you be running short!

The Better Half and I tucked into a delicious meal of seasonal food, chosen from the incredibly varied and impressive menu. I enjoyed my British asparagus whilst being grateful I'd managed to veto his choice of the ominously named "pigs head". We were also very impressed with the wine list which was extensive but also very good value for London. If one of you is driving the 500ml carafe is also a great alternative to sharing a bottle - and terribly Continental!

It's also worth mentioning (although we haven't done an official GDG review) that on the 1st and 3rd Sunday of every month Sam's plays host to some fabulous Jazz singers. Could be the perfect option if you want something a little bit different for a Sunday date?

Date wise this place ticks all the right boxes. The food and service are great, but more importantly the atmosphere is perfect for a romance. In our opinion this is is a classic early days option.

Click here to read our review of Sam's Brasserie on the GDG date-a-base!

Bank Holiday Romance

So, the first Bank Holiday of the year. The weather has been fantastic over the last few days and summer's on its way, so Miss Mary thought she would plan a romantic little trip to the New Forest - she and Other Half will be staying in the adults only (ooh err) section of Toms Field Campsite in Hampshire.

The BBQ has arrived from Amazon, the sunglasses have been returned by the friend whose sunny garden they were left in, the sun cream's been dug out from the back of the bathroom cupboard, the weather forecast has been checked… hang on… what… change of plan? No way! Miss Mary's a true Brit and there's nothing we Brits love more than a little bit of friendly competition from the weather!

Other Half is not so excited about putting the sun cream back in the cupboard and swapping his flip-flops for a pair of wellies, but hey-ho it will still be a great weekend!

If you're not convinced that camping makes a great date you'd be wrong. Miss Mary isn't exactly suggesting it for a first date (that would definitely be a bad idea) but it's a great thing for couples to do. At the risk of sounding like a therapist, it gets you out of London, away from your laptop and (although I hate the phrase) it allows you to spend "quality time" together.

Having said that, it might be worth asking Miss Mary on Tuesday what the definition of "quality time" is, as she and Other Half will be coming to terms with the fallout over the tent-assembly-in-the-rain/dark situation!

If you think you've got a better idea for a great date this Bank Holiday weekend (some would argue that wouldn't be very difficult) then let us know. Post a comment below, on the website, on the facebook page, or email us.

Whatever your plans are this weekend - enjoy!

Action Date!

Below is the first of our features from guest bloggers - this week it is the wonderfully witty Sarah Finley who writes The Loves and Life of a London Girl. Keep reading to hear what she has to say about the fearful prospect of being asked out on an "action date"!

WARNING: Action dates are not for the faint-hearted...

For me dating is usually in the safe surroundings of a bar or restaurant – where alcohol is readily supplied and comfort is key. So when a potential date asked me accompany him to a spinning class – for our first date – I almost bottled it.

Now I’m not the kind of girl to shy away from a bit of exercise – I’m a regular on the spinning bikes and running has recently become like a dear old friend, unlike the enemy it was during cross country PE lessons at school. But exercising and dating – now that would be a first.

And any sort of action dates, I suppose if I’m honest, scare me. I’m prone to falling over in heels after a few too many vinos so god knows what would happen if you armed me with a bowling ball, some ice skates or even a dart. More than likely it would end with some sort of embarrassment or my date phoning 999 – not the best first impression.

Begrudgingly I of course agreed to the spinning date – he was cute, I’m shallow and I hadn’t been on a date in ages! Getting me out of the house was a different matter – my friend had to literally push me out of the door before I changed my mind. And when I arrived at the gym I wasn’t any better – my nerves had hit that point which meant I was physically shaking and I’m sure I started sweating even before any exercise took place. How was I going to get through a whole spinning class? And more to the point did he actually think I’d be able to make any decent conversation while I was slowly turning a beetroot shade of red and panting for England.

But I figured if he still liked me after seeing me all hot and bothered then I must be on to a winner. So, on we span, with a middle-aged sweaty man in between us, while we tried to make decent conversation and I pretended not to be too self conscious about the sweat dripping down my face.

Of course I expected him to avoid me like the plague afterwards so when he asked me out on a normal date – in a cosy bar with all my familiarities – I couldn’t believe ‘action Sarah’ had actually gone and done it. Now where did I put those darts...

Written by Sarah Finley

For more of Sarah’s dating tales visit her blog http://thelovesandlifeofalondongirl.blogspot.com

Rootmaster

Tired of the same old restaurants? Read on to find out about something VERY different! In fact, we are not even talking about a restaurant, we are talking about a bustaurant! That's right - the Rootmaster is a restaurant on an old Routemaster bus!

So, if you are looking for a quirky date we think we've come up trumps. You can start your date off by grabbing a drink at one of our East London favourite haunts The Boundary, or go to any of the trendy bars within the eternally hip Truman Brewery.

Once you've quenched your thirst, head along to the bus, located in Ely's Yard which is part of the Truman Brewery. The Rootmaster is London's first vegan bustaurant. Founded in 2006 it aims to promote healthly living and respect for the environment, but if that all sounds too noble for you, don't worry - it is also a fantastically original venue in its own right serving delicious grub! Anyway, it will do you good to have a conscience for the night - it might even impress your date...

Having said that, if your date is a serious carnivore they might not love you for taking them to the Rootmaster but we think even hardened meat eaters should allow themselves one night off to come to this brilliant bustaurant. Renowned for it's relaxed atmosphere and friendly staff it would make a great option for a first date.

You'll get turfed off the bus at 11pm (10.30pm on Sunday) but that doesn't mean your night has to be over. There are loads of late night venues in the area but one of our favourites has got to be The Brickhouse. They offer live cabaret every night so you and your date are guaranteed to be entertained until the wee small hours!