For The Love of Life!

I meant to write this blog post a while ago but life got in the way...  It's a review of a FANTASTIC pop-up restaurant I went to in Clapham at the end of last month.  Keep your eye on the FTLOL website to see if/when they do another pop-up because it is well worth going.

For the Love of Life at Tony's has got to be one of the best meals out that I have had in a long time - and I go to a lot of restaurants!

They had made Tony's (a fantastic greasy spoon in it's own right) into a quirky and cosy little restaurant with fresh flowers, candles and mismatched cutlery and crockery on each table.

The staff were friendly and helpful, not to mention skilful in navigating their way around the tiny cafe! It was BYOB and they kept all the white wines in massive bucket on the counter but never needed to be reminded which bottle belonged to which table... 

The food was absolutely delicious. I started with asparagus with a deep fried soft boiled egg which was cooked to perfection (never a certainty with asparagus). There were lots of murmurs of "how do they do that?" relating to the fact that the egg was perfectly soft boiled on the inside and perfectly deep fried on the outside - too much for our booze addled brains to make sense of!

Next up was a delicious (and not too rich/filling) parpadelle with basil but the star of the show had to be the desert... 

My table all opted for the doughnut station. A sort of DIY doughnut extravaganza with giant syringes of melted chocolate, crème Anglaise and strawberry jam. Not only did the doughnuts melt in the mouth but the whole humour of the doughnut station captured the relaxed and unpretentious attitude of FTLOL at Tony's. The food, the service, the atmosphere were all fantastic but there was none of the gastro-snobbery you sometimes find at pop-ups. 

Their aim was clearly to make sure that we (the punters) had a fantastic evening. Mission accomplished!

If FTLOL decide to do another pop-up restaurant then the team at the GDG would suggest you book it ASAP. The delicious food and the great atmosphere are perfect for a date, and ladies, the brownie points you'd get for agreeing to take your date to a greasy spoon will go a long way!

New Year, Old Flame....

Those of you who follow my blog will know I wasn’t exactly blessed with good dating karma last year.

Blind dates, internet dates, they all seemed to go awry in their own special way. But not to be deterred I decided to throw myself into 2011 with a new and improved dating outlook – no more disasters, no more debacles, just good old-fashioned boy meets girl.

I was therefore thrilled when the first dating possibility of the year came from an old flame at university. We’d been on a couple of dates and although it had fizzled out I remembered him being fun, chatty and definitely a bit of a catch. He’d stayed up north after graduation rather than joining the mass exodus to London and I hadn’t heard much from him since. We sent the occasional text but this was the first time he’d wanted to meet up. He was heading to London for work and wanted to take me out to dinner – brilliant, the perfect start to my new year, new love life.

All the pre-date banter was spot-on; he was a man with a plan and had the bar, the restaurant, the timings all sorted.  I’m normally not one to commit to dinner on a first date as you never know how things are going to go and if you’ll end up stuck in a restaurant with your worst nightmare. But this was an old friend, no danger here I thought and happily agreed to his dinner date.

I nervously waited at the bar for the man I hadn’t seen for a few years and hoped he was just as I remembered him. And suddenly there he was – looking exactly as I remembered him… even down to the uni rugby top and slightly battered jeans that he always used to wear.

We ordered drinks and started reminiscing about our uni days – the people, the bars, the clubs, the Union… but we just didn’t seem to have anything else to talk about. We’d covered everything we had in common by the end of drink two and it was clear to me that whatever chemistry we had a few years ago was sadly long gone. I was sure he felt exactly the same and was about to suggest we leave it at just drinks when he brought up the restaurant.

‘I’ve made a reservation for 8.30 so we should get going – I can’t wait to take you to this place, it’s meant to be amazing!’ he said.

“Oh right…great then!’ I replied, not wanting to be rude when he seemed so keen to try this place.

10 minutes later and we were seated at the restaurant trying to drag out yet more uni conversation over two long and awkward courses. We were obviously both working hard to keep the chat going but the date was quickly falling flat. At long last it was time for the bill and we could both make our escape, and even though he’d made it clear he’d wanted to take me out for dinner it just didn’t seem fair to let him pay when it was so obvious there was no attraction from either side. 

When the bill was put on the table I reached into my handbag for my wallet and waited for him to do the same. I waited, and then I waited a bit more… click here to find out what happened in the end!

Written by our lovely, anonymous, bad date blogger!

The Dreaded Awkward Silence...

Good chat can make or break a date so the art of conversation is crucial if you’re going to click with someone. There’s no hiding in a one-on-one situation but remember, a date is a marathon not a sprint, so be prepared because you never know when one of those awkward silences is about to descend.

BAD DATE BLOG PART 5: AWKWARD SILENCES

It may seem a bit calculating but having a couple of prepared questions up your sleeve is no bad thing. My uni housemate, for example, always favoured ‘Do you play a musical instrument?’ as her back-up question….but then she is still single so maybe try and be a bit more creative! I certainly wish I’d had an emergency subject to fall back on recently when an absolute shocker of a conversation pause led to pretty disastrous consequences.

Let me set the scene – I’d met Rugby Boy in a bar the weekend before and we agreed to go for drinks. He was sweet, funny, and pretty easy to talk to so drinks seemed a safe bet. We met for a shandy or two in Clapham and we were getting on really well….the only problem was I just wasn’t sure if I was attracted to him. There wasn’t any real chemistry and I was definitely thinking more friend than fancy-man.

Still, we were having a great time chatting away and despite a few suggestive comments coming across the table from the rugger bugger, I was doing my best to keep things more friendly than flirty.

It was nearly closing time and I was feeling pretty pleased to have met such a great new mate when I could suddenly feel it coming – the awkward silence. He’d just returned from the bar with drinks and the conversation stalled – we had run out of things to say. He stared; I stared; he awkwardly played with a beer mat; I nonchalantly fiddled with my hair.

‘So…’ I began, racking my brains for a new topic of conversation. ‘How far is it to your place from here?’

Rugby boy slowly put the beer mat down, coyly smiled at me and slid his hand over the table to stroke mine in what I think was supposed to be an alluring way.

‘I thought you’d never ask, we can be back at mine in 5 - I’ll get us a cab.’

Oh no, awkward silence panic had led to a slightly provocative but totally accidental agreement to a first date sleepover! I racked my brains to think of a way to back track but I couldn’t work out what to say so another sizable silence descended on our table.

He dropped my hand abruptly as I stammered and explained I just had an interest in London geography and didn’t actually intend on joining him on the five minute journey back to his bachelor pad.

A cab was then indeed hailed but it was for a solo passenger as Rugby Boy made a speedy enough exit to keep any winger on their toes. An awkward goodbye, an even more awkward peck on the cheek and I was left standing outside the bar watching as his taxi disappeared into the distance.

That was the end of what could have been a beautiful friendship.

Written by our lovely, anonymous, bad date blogger!

The Bad Date Blog

Some more words of wisdom from our unlucky in love Bad Date Blogger, who has a cautionary tale to tell about friends bearing photographs…

A great way to get out there on a few dates is to call on your friends for a set-up or two. Most people I know always love a bit of matchmaking and are more than willing to help you find a date for Friday night - usually some amazing catch that they’ve been hiding away from you for years. But beware, while I’m sure much happiness has been found using this technique, make sure you know exactly what you’re getting into, and more importantly that you tell your friends exactly what you’re looking for.

BAD DATE BLOG PART 3: THE SET-UP

My tale starts with a suggestion of a set-up from my housemate with his friend from work. I happily agreed to a photo exchange, which now seems to be standard practice for set-ups of any kind. I quickly sent off the most recent photo of myself I could find on facebook where I wasn’t drunk/hungover/embarrassing myself. This was easier said than done but thankfully the fancy dress outfit didn’t scare off my potential date and an email with his chosen piccies soon arrived in my inbox. First impressions were not bad – nice smile, tall, full head of hair – pretty much all I’m looking for in a man…. Ok, so maybe not 100% my type but definitely worth a drink.

So a week and a bit later and I was heading off to meet my set-up for a drink in South Ken. I was feeling pretty optimistic, he’d chosen a great bar to meet in, seemed lovely on pre-date texts, and of course, I’d already seen the photos….

I wandered into the pub and started scanning the crowd, but no one was looking familiar apart from the spitting image of my dad’s best friend propping up the bar in the corner. I did a double-take but ignored him as there was no way the 65 year grandfather of three from Oxford would have been downing a pint in London on a Tuesday night.

Thinking I must have arrived a bit early, I grabbed a table and planned to wait for my date to come to me. But 5 or 10 minutes passed and still nothing… until I catch the eye of Gramps at the bar. He stares back. He smiles. He heads over to my table…

copyright Xavier  Bertels 

Unsure what to do I smiled nervously back as he approached wondering what this old man might want. I started to feel uneasy as he pulled out a chair at my table, sat down, and started to speak:

‘Hi ****, I didn’t see you come in – what would you like to drink?’

Damn, he knows my name, definitely my “blind” date then, as I realise the photo evidence I had seen must have been taken more than a few years (and dress sizes) ago. Not exactly what had been advertised by my housemate. Right, only one thing for it -

‘Mine’s a gin and tonic. Large’

Several drinks later I was actually having a good time. My OAP escort was pretty funny and easy to talk to… it was just a crying shame that he looked 30 years older than every other bloke in the pub! Did I have a good evening? Yes. Did sparks eventually fly? Ummm, no.  As lovely as he was I just didn’t fancy him. Don’t get me wrong, I’m a firm believer that personality is much more important than looks but I don’t think love was going to flourish when my first impression was disappointment. I was promised a tasty-looking young chap but ended up with a slightly more ‘distinguished’ gentleman.

It certainly hasn’t put me off set-ups as it was a perfectly pleasant evening but I’ll be wary of friends bearing photos in future. Needless to say I had words with my housemate - false advertising just isn’t cool people.

Written by our lovely, anonymous, bad date blogger!

The Bad Date Blog

Some more words of wisdom from our unlucky in love Bad Date Blogger, who made the fatal mistake of mixing burning hot oil with a third date...

So you’ve hopefully read my last blog and arrived at your date safely and in one piece but what now? The age-old question of what to do on a first date is a good one and should be thought through carefully… very carefully! Many a potential relationship has stalled due to over-ambitious or over-complicated dates so just watch it when coming up with a plan.

BAD DATE BLOG PART 2 - ACTIVITY AND ENTERTAINMENT

A fine example of this is my infamous Pancake Day date that seemed like such a good idea on paper and just went from bad to worse. It was a third date I think and the man in question wanted to cook me dinner. Excellent, I thought, there’s nothing more attractive than a bloke who can cook. I then realised that he’d suggested Shrove Tuesday so I said ‘Great, you cook dinner, I’ll do pancakes for dessert!’

It started rather well; I arrived at his flat and was pleasantly surprised to see it was a relatively girl-friendly zone. You never know what to expect when venturing into the man’s domain for the first time but his place was really nice, no beer can sculptures in the corner or Hollyoaks calendars on the walls – phew!

Wine was swiftly provided (the easiest way to make me feel at home) and he set to work in the kitchen. It all smelt delicious until a plate of suspiciously pink chicken was presented on the table in front of me. Right – what to do? Should I tuck in and hope for the best, or point it out and probably offend the chef? Is food poisoning ever sexy…? Too late to decide; he quickly spotted the problem and whisked my plate away, suggesting we move straight onto pancakes.

A lucky escape and it meant moving straight onto the fun part of the date – I mean how could anyone not love a bit of batter action? So the eggs were in the bowl, the oil was heating in the pan and a flipping challenge was quickly thrown out there by my date. Not being one to back down I limbered up and went for the full 360 degree flip. It might have been a slightly over-zealous attempt as I shot red-hot oil straight into my date’s eye who started screaming and holding his face in agony! ‘I’m blind! I’m blind!’

He quickly calmed down, as it must have occurred to him that his girlish screams were probably not attracting the lady, and suddenly manned up. But the damage had been done and any chance for romance got smaller and smaller as his eye got redder and redder!

It seemed a tactical retreat was the only answer so I made my excuses and left him to his eye bath. Funnily enough there wasn’t a fourth date – apparently some men just don’t like it when their dates maim them - what is the world coming to?

Written by our lovely, anonymous, bad date blogger!